It's no use. Try as I might, the sleep won't come. It's not for lack of being tired. The truth is, I'm exhausted. Yet sleep eludes me. So here I sit on this familiar couch, pondering my day and the gamut of emotions it held. More than once I cried. The first set of tears came remembering a particularly sad season in life. The next round was for a friend embarking on what may turn out to be a very painful journey. The last tears I shed were through laughter and the sheer joy of being with those I love the most.
Can any good come from a sleepless night, I ask myself. I think so. The quietness of the house provides me with the perfect opportunity to think through a long and emotionally charged day. It's the ideal time to pray, and not with eloquent words. The sighs and the stirrings in my heart are prayers in their purest form, rising straight to the throne of God. How reassuring that he already knows what weighs on me.
Mostly, this alone time helps me to look back with eyes of gratitude. Yes, life can be hard. And boy, can it hurt. But in the midst of it, there is always a reason to pause and see the good that rises from the ashes. Today was a helpful reminder. Had I not walked on a particularly rough road in life, I wouldn't have been able to come along side another who may be facing a similar path of her own.
How about you? How do you cope with a sleepless night? Do you grow frustrated and annoyed? Or do you give in and let it speak to you? I hope you sleep soundly and peacefully tonight. But if you don't, I pray for a different kind of rest for you, nestled close in your Father's embrace. For he never sleeps, and his arms are always open wide, ready to engulf you. Sound asleep or wide awake, I wish you a good night.
"Some praise the Lord for light, the living spark; I thank God for the night, the healing dark." ~Robert William Service
"God's promises are like the stars; the darker the night the brighter they shine."
"What I take from my nights, I add to my days." ~Leon de Rotrou
Every evening I turn my worries over to God. He's going to be up all night anyway."
~Mary C. Crowley
"A 'bad night' isn't always a bad thing." ~Brian W. Aldiss
"He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. And he knows everything, inside and out. He energizes those who get tired, gives strength to dropouts. For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall. But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind."
~Isaiah 40, The Message